Anyone can Google to find a quick answer. But sometimes, the simplest answer isn't the smartest. JK enjoys big questions and interrogations. Maybe you're wooing that smart girl in calculus class. Maybe it's National Pi Day. Maybe you're trying to impress your teacher. For whatever reason, you're here looking for the best math jokes, and here are my favorites from Reddit, Twitter, online, and told to me by my silliest, geekiest friends.
It takes a special talent to sound kind of dumb and sort of smart at the same time. It's all in the delivery, so remember to show your work. A statistics professor is going through security at the airport when they discover a bomb in his carry-on.
The TSA officer is livid. There are three people applying for the same job at a bank: a mathematician, a statistician, and an accountant. The interviewing committee asks the mathematician one question: What is plus ? The mathematician answers "" without hesitation, and they send him along. Next they call in the statistician and ask the same question. He thinks for a moment and answers " A physicist, a mathematician, and a computer scientist are discussing whether it is better to have a husband or a boyfriend.
You have security. When I'm not with my husband, he assumes I'm with my boyfriend. And with my boyfriend, it's the other way around. So I can spend most of my time doing what I want, without anyone disturbing me. Sign in or sign up and post using a HubPages Network account. Comments are not for promoting your articles or other sites. I liked the long ones the best. Some of the short jokes were cringy, but some were really funny.
I hate Math, but many of these are funny. Did you make any of them up on your own? You should give it a shot. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. HubPages and Hubbers authors may earn revenue on this page based on affiliate relationships and advertisements with partners including Amazon, Google, and others. HubPages Inc, a part of Maven Inc. As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things.
To provide a better website experience, owlcation. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.Do you want Weekly Jokes sent to your inbox? What's your favorite science joke? Order the shirt here.
You can purchase the shirt here. Photo Credit: Teepublic. An optimist sees a glass half full. A pessimist sees it half empty. An engineer sees it twice as large as it needs to be. Why are tails so mean? They just need to be caudaled Why is the spinal column so audacious?
Because he's got nerve! Why is the eye like the moon? They're both in orbit! Did you know? Biology is the only science in which multiplication is the same thing as division. Why did the student fail the cadaver lab? She just couldn't cut it. Happy Halloween! The politically-aware chemistry student protested by carrying a picket sign that stated: "Free Radicals Now!
Did you hear about the industrialist who had a huge chloroform spill at his factory? His business went insolvent. A biologist, a chemist, and a statistician are out hunting. The biologist shoots at a deer and misses 5 feet to the left. The chemist takes a shot and misses 5 feet to the right. The statistician yells, Yes! We got 'em! Science definition : -- a particular area of study -- doing stuff in a lab that would be a felony in your garage.
What do you call a swim team made up of girls named Jennifer?
What is the name of the first electricity detective? Sherlock Ohms! If Avogadro calls, tell him to leave his number. Never trust an atom Are you a carbon sample?Science can be a heavy topic. Thank goodness science lends itself to some pretty good jokes. Here are 20 of our favorite cheesy science jokes to share with your students. They are just the formula you need for a few good laughs. Do you have any cheesy science jokes in your repertoire?
Elizabeth Mulvahill is a passionate teacher, writer and mom who loves learning new things, traveling the globe and everything Zen. You must be logged in to post a comment.
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Funny Science Puns to Keep Your Ion the Prize
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Science and pop culture can connect! Posted by Elizabeth Mulvahill Elizabeth Mulvahill is a passionate teacher, writer and mom who loves learning new things, traveling the globe and everything Zen. All Posts. Leave a reply Cancel reply You must be logged in to post a comment.
Here Are 25 Jokes That Only Nerds Will Understand. If You Laugh Then Yep, You’re A Nerd!
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31 of the most cringe-worthy science jokes
Non-necessary Non-necessary.Scientists are not known to be funny, as a matter of fact they can be very serious due to the nature of their job. But it will surprise you to realise that most of these science jokes are very funny, even more than most of the popular jokes you know. Some will make you think deep, some will make you giggle while some will make you laugh out loud. Merrick Furst. There is not now, and never will be, a language in which it is the least bit difficult to write bad programs.
Documentation is like sex: when it is good, it is very, very good; and when it is bad, it is better than nothing. There are 10 types of people: those who understand binary, and those who do not understand it. How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
Q: How many Heisenbergs does it take to change a light bulg? Q: Did you hear about the homeopath who forgot to take his medicine? A: He died of an overdose. Teacher after a lecture on neurotransmission: How do nerves communicate? Student: Cellular phones. Do you know any mole jokes? If so, call OK last one.
Did you hear about the chemist who was reading a book about Helium? What did one electron say to the other electron? What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder? Q: Three kittens were on a roof. Q: Why did Dracula quit grad school? A: His next-generation sequencing results drove him bat ChIP crazy. But, in practice, there is. How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber? Chartcons — Communications, Inspiration, Relationship and Entrepreneurship.Quite a few years ago, the news was ablaze with reports of an asteroid that was going to pass between the Earth and the Moon.
Although more precise calculations showed that the path was not going to be that close, the "near miss" was still the talk of the day in my ninth grade physical science class. It was a great day -- students were peppering me with questions about asteroids and the solar system. Eventually, one of my students asked about what a large asteroid impact would do to our Moon.
I jokingly responded that instead of having on Full Moon, we would have two halves. Most of the students groaned, but I could tell that one of my brighter students was deep in thought. Eventually she asked, "But if the Moon was destroyed, how would we have nighttime? As the son of two teachers, I learned at an early age that humor -- or at least attempts at humor -- are a staple of good science teaching.
In fact, for years my dad told this joke to his students, "How do you tell a boy chromosome from a girl chromosome? What better way to celebrate the beginning of a new school year and the 20th anniversary of Edutopia than by sharing a list of 20 bad science jokes!
Teacher: Can you name the three kinds of blood vessels? Student: Yes. Arteries, veins and caterpillars. Q: What is the only known thing to travel faster than the speed of light? A: A Chuck Norris roundhouse kick. Q: Did you hear about the homeopath who forgot to take his medicine? A: He died of an overdose. Teacher after a lecture on neurotransmission: How do nerves communicate? Student: Cellular phones. A neutron walked into a bar and asked, "How much for a drink?
Two atoms were walking down the hallway when one of them said, "I think I lost an electron! Q: How many Heisenbergs does it take to change a light bulg? A: If you know the number, you don't know where the light bulb is.
At this point, you are probably wondering if I have any more jokes? Perhaps one about sodium?
To that, I answer, "Na. However, I know every one of you has a collection of science jokes that make your students groan. Share yours in the comment section.The popularity of these science puns seem to be gaining in momentum. If you need any convincing, give these 43 puns about science a whirl and you too will find this to be a positive experience that will certainly get you and your friends charged up.
There was an attack at the art exhibits in the museum, and they are saying now the science hall is history.SANS PUNS MAKE SURE YOU CAN'T WATCH PAST 15 SECONDS WITHOUT LAUGHING! (Undertale Comic Dub s)
Anyone who is involved with breeding science lab animals is considered to be part of the rat race. The reason why the atheists can not solve exponential equations is simply because they do not believe in higher powers. While the optimist sees the glass half full and the pessimist sees it as half empty, the science teacher sees it twice as large as it need be.
I learned in science class that if you want to cut the sea in half you need to make use of a sea-saw. They teach in my science class that the first animal to go to space was that cow that jumped over the moon. The scientist took off his doorbell from his home because he was hoping to win the no-bell prize. The reason a burger will have less energy than a steak is because the burger is in a ground state. The reason that the mushroom is always invited to parties is because he is considered to be a fun guy.
When the man was crushed to death by a pile of science books, he only had his shelf to blame. What is the reaction of everyone when they heard that oxygen and magnesium are going on a date?
These 43 silly science puns are sure to peak your intellect but tickle your funny bone at the same time. If you have more time, read also our selection of other funny puns or these great music puns.
This website is dedicated to those who love everything about puns. We love writing puns because they catch you off guard and give us the chance to switch up meanings in a fun way. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment.
Prev Article. Related Articles. Leave a Reply Cancel reply Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment.By KylonMay 21, in The Lounge. This is for bad science jokes. All the worst puns, ect For the more intellectuals of this forum you will probably stay away from this. But for as of us immature people, I would like to post this post so they can put all their vulgarity, nastiness, and stupidity into one box.
Is this going to turn into a "demonstrate unoriginality" thread, or was that just on the remote chance I'd never heard of ThinkGeek? Two hydrogen atoms are inside a star, about to fuse into helium. The other says: "It's getting quite hot in here. A talking hydrogen atom! A quark goes to an elevator. The operator asks "up or down?
Well, is it a poor joke about a German word? Why yes it is, thank you for asking. You need to be a member in order to leave a comment.
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The Lounge Search In. Bad science jokes Prev 1 2 3 Next Page 1 of 3. Recommended Posts. Posted May 21, I here its round and gassy. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites.
How do you tell the sex of a chromazone? Take down it's jeans! Posted May 22, Indeed they do.